
The Uncanny Coffee Hour with Dr Kitsune and Odd Bob
From Yokai and Bigfoot sightings to spirits, other-worldly beings and UFO encounters, we share stories and interviews; exploring evidence, theories, and philosophical implications. Always respectful with a touch of impish irreverence, we gather stories with wit and wisdom encouraging a strong look at Indigenous perspectives.
This project has been brewing in our minds for years and now with the help of our community (including the uncanny world) we are making it a reality.
The Uncanny Coffee Hour with Dr Kitsune and Odd Bob
Kitsune
We're thrilled to launch our podcast with a journey into the heart of Japanese mythology! Our first episode explores the fascinating story of the Kitsune and the Tiger Bride, a legend that has captivated audiences for centuries. We'll examine some of the characteristics of the shapeshifting Kitsune, the symbolism of the tiger, and the complex relationship between the two main characters. Get to know us as we uncover the significance of this tale and discuss its enduring appeal while becoming a part of the uncanny coffee hour family.
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Buy Me A Coffee: https://buymeacoffee.com/uncannycoffee
(Dr. K already has tea)
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Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Hey, Mitch. Hey, man. What's up? Not much. I'm sitting here getting ready to do something exciting and have a drink. You want some coffee? No, man. That shit will kill me. You know that. You want some tea? Yeah. All right. Hold on a second. There you go. Cool. So you want to know what I'm so excited about? Yeah. I mean, you did call me over here. What's the deal?
UNKNOWN:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:We're making a podcast. We? What, you got a midget in your pocket? You can't say midget, dude. It's little people. Little people are something else. Like Ireland or something? No, no, no, no. I'm not talking about short people like Hopis and Irish or anything like that. I mean little people like stick Indians. Stick indigenous peoples. Dude, come on. Get with the program. No, stick in. You're going to get us in trouble. It's our first episode. We're going to get in trouble. Little people, you know, like from the spirit world. They kind of live halfway between the spirit world and our world. Oh, they're like skinwalkers. Anyway, that's not what I'm talking about. Podcast. Yeah. What's the deal, man? Yeah, we're doing this podcast. It's going to be rad. Who? You and me. You're here. We're doing it. It's happening. Here. I need you to read this. What is it? Let's see. Welcome to the Dr. Kitsune and Odd Bob Uncanny Coffee Hour. Yeah. Good job. An hour? No, no, no. We're not going to talk for an hour. Statistically, you want to do somewhere between 18 and 28 minutes. I think that's sort of the sweet spot for a podcast. What are you going to do? Shouldn't it be welcome to the Dr. Kitsune... Doesn't it sound better to say an hour? I'm not going to say the 18 to 20 minutes. Uncanny Coffee 28 minutes. Yeah, you're right. All right. Let's go with an hour. All right. So... From the lugubrious lowlands of East Springfield, welcome to the Dr. Kitsune and Odd Bob Uncanny Coffee Hour, brought to you this week by Dr. Kitsune's Miracle Oil, one million and one uses. Cures horse fates, coughs, colds, runny nose, makes conception a wonder, and childbirth a pleasure. I had a baby! For all your lubrication needs. Okay, that sounds okay. I'm good with that. Yeah, see? We're off to a good start. All right, so do you want to know what we're going to talk about? We're just going to make something that people love and that we love making. And if we get enough people subscribing, then maybe we can, you know, advertise or something. I'm in. We'll get sponsors. Okay, I'm in. Yeah. You were in when I said it's going to be fun. Yeah, I know. I was in when you called. I was in when I walked through the door. I'm in. All right. So turn on the recorder. Let's start recording. Oh, I've been recording this whole time. Yeah. It started. So, like, I'm into Bigfoot and stuff. And you were into, what are those called? Bigfeet? No, no. You know what Bigfeet means, right? Like the Japanese. Bigfeet. All it means is big shoes. That's all I'm telling you right now. Oh, you're talking about yokai. Yeah. Yokai. Yeah. I'm into yokai. Yeah, what are yokai? Yokai, they're like Japanese, what people would call mythical creatures from Japanese folklore, but I prefer to classify them more in the cryptid category, kind of like Sasquatch or little people. Like leprechauns? Not like small human beings because you don't want me to say midget anymore. Yeah, you're talking about like fairies or leprechauns. Fae, yeah, from that fae category. Yeah, okay. Very cool. I know you're really good at telling stories. What, just off the top of my head? Yeah. Let me pull something out of my ass. Episode one, yep. God, I don't work well under pressure like that. Can we pause this? No. All right. We can't pause this. We have cheap recording material or recording software. Just a second. Let me see if I have something on my phone. I actually think I have a story. I knew you would. I actually wrote this down for my tattoo artist. It's the story of my wife and I. Okay. Well, sort of the story of my wife and I that my mom told me. All right. I'm confused. About Kitsune. But just read the story. Kitsune story. Maybe it'll make more sense. Yeah. Do you know who Kitsune is? Vaguely. It's like him and like a raccoon that hang out or something, right? Tanuki. Yeah. He and Tanuki are tricksters from Japan. Yeah. Similar to Coyote. And Spider, the spider here, Iktomi and Shomikasi here. And Tanuki isn't a badger. Tanuki is actually a wild dog, part of the canid family. But he looks kind of like the unholy love child of a badger, a raccoon, and a dog. He's
SPEAKER_01:rad because he's always like partying. He's got like a
SPEAKER_00:beer in his hand. He's always got alcohol. He's always got shochu or sake. He's got huge balls. Yeah, I was going to ask, why are they always so? Because he's got, I mean, real life Tanuki's have huge balls. he's got huge balls and you know he does stuff like parachutes using a scrotum and yeah just catches fish he'll he'll catch fish using his scrotum and okay he can like swoop up the whole ocean in the in his scrotum they're so huge okay and he's a pretty likes department i don't know if i like this visual tanuki is like the the happy trickster and kitsune is like kind of the the mean trickster but they hang out together They do hang out together. And they have adventures together, but they also have their own adventures. And there's lots of different types of kitsunes out there. We'll probably talk about them in future episodes if we're going to do this much. Sure. There's kitsune, the nine-tailed fox. And each hundred years that a kitsune lives, they get another tail. These magical kitsune. Got it. Not just standard kitsune. Not just like the garden run-of-the-mill foxes that are out there. I'm talking magical kitsune. So kitsune is just the name for foxes. It is. So if you're in Japan, you see a red small dog looking type thing. That's a kitsune, but that's not the kitsune. Okay. And it's not kitsune, which is the trickster fox. It might be, but it's not usually. Then there's like kita kitsune and... They're pipe foxes that tell you the future. They live in little bamboo. Anyway, we're getting away from this. So the story I have for you is called The Tiger Bride, and it's a kitsune story. This story was told to me by my mom twice. That's part of this story. So let's give it a try, all right? All right, let's go. The Tiger Bride. Out of everyone in our family, mom was not a storyteller. She told stories, but rarely did she tell stories. Her stories were like... Eating unflavored jello or plain tofu compared to the wildly spicy stories from my other family members. She was pragmatic in her daily routine, with little care to preserve the culture or history of our family. She took for granted her culture, what she was immersed in as a child, and saw it only as a hindrance, a millstone around the necks of her own children. The world she left behind was full of superstition, poverty, struggle, and benjo ditches. In her mind, it was backwards. and she mostly left it behind. The new golden world she moved to had food, opportunity, and indoor plumbing that flushed with the push of a lever. The great trick played on her was, no matter how much she tried to leave behind the shackles of post-Meiji Kumamoto, she could not shake the foundational beliefs that were so ingrained to her persona. She didn't even know they were there. Why do you tap the rice paddle on the pot three times before you open it? Are you knocking to see if someone's in there? What do you mean? she said. You just tapped on the pot three times, I said. No, I didn't, she laughed. You always do it. Ton, ton, ton, she said, as she tapped the pot again, turning and tapping the paddle on my nose with a laugh. I never got an answer from her, ever. However, as I was casually reading about Kitsune, and some of the beliefs and superstitions around Kitsune on the southern island of Kyushu, where Kumamoto is located, I read that to tap the rice pot three times is to call all of the kitsune spirits to come and eat. If you do not call them to eat first, the rice you serve from that pot will not taste as sweet and will never fully fill your belly, feed your body, or fulfill your spirit. Why do you do that, even though you don't scoop any rice? She had a habit. No, it was more of an obsessive need. to always scoop at least two times when filling a rice bowl. She would scoop rice into a bowl, then she would touch the rice in the pot with the paddle and move it empty to the bowl, lightly touching it to the rice already scooped. What do you mean? You just put an empty scoop of rice in that bowl. No, I didn't, she laughed. You always do it. You always put an empty scoop in the bowl after you've filled it. No, I don't. Yes, you always do. Why? Only peasants have one scoop of rice. What if there's only one scoop in the pot? There's always more than one scoop in the pot. We always ate kobucha pumpkin on the full moon of October. Why do I have to eat it? I asked. It's not that I didn't like it. I just hated being forced to do anything. I hate pumpkin, I said. You have to eat one bite or you will be sick. I won't get sick. No, you'll be sicky. You'll be sicky, boy. You mean sickly, I said, making fun of her and over-articulating the word. Sick-ly, I said again, emphasizing the word and making fun of her accent. Eat it, she said. The second time I heard the story about the tiger bride was when I told my mom I asked Denise to marry me. This was the first time I really paid attention to the story, and the second to the last time I would hear it. Years later, when I asked her to tell me the story again, she actually said... What story? I don't know any stories. I tried to use my highly developed skills in interviewing to get her to remember. I reminded her of common stories about Tanuki and Kitsune and said, What about the story of the fox's wedding? Kitsune yonomeri? I don't know what you're talking about. Are you trying to say something in Japanese? I can't quite describe it, but Mom always had a mischievous mean streak, where if I wanted something I could not get on my own and she had the power to deny me, she would. She held these stories as her own treasure, locked in the vault of her mind. Only she had the key. She and I have always had a complicated relationship. Like I said, I could really be a disrespectful ass at times. There may be a reason or two why she threw away the key. There may be a reason she felt I did not deserve the treasures of our family. As a storyteller, the treasures I most desired. This is how I remember the story, as pieced together from the few times my mom told it to me, before her mind decided to take little journeys from her body, before those stories were gone forever. I did add a bit of flourish to the story in the form of dialogue, as well as details in my mind that I filled in when mom was giving her unseasoned tofu versions of Japanese folk life. Undoubtedly, you've heard the story of the fox's wedding, a cautionary tale told to children to keep them close to home during sun showers. though I am not sure why one would need to stay close during a sun shower. The threat of having to go live with the foxes forever always seemed like a sweet promise to me. The opportunity to go to Kitsune's wedding is something I always looked forward to and continue to plan for to this day. The day I walk my final path and leave this world, I pray for a sun shower, that Kitsune will finally come to take me home beneath the rainbow bridge. The Tiger Bride Kitsune was walking on the mountainside, on his way to cross the valley to where his clan made their home. Maybe he was returning from the wedding of a neighboring clan. Maybe he was just wandering the countryside. It was early summer, after the last spring rains had fallen. He stopped on the mountainside to pick some plums."'What makes you think you can eat the plums of the Tiger King?' said a musical voice."'Oh!' He and I are great friends, the young Kitsune lied. And who might you be, the voice said from another direction completely. Kitsune, not wanting to appear surprised, looked that way by only moving his eyes. He saw a flicker of movement. I am Kitsune, he said with the flick of his tail. The musical voice laughed. You are not Kitsune. You are tiny, and you only have one tail. You are not the great nine-tail. Kitsune savored another plum, spitting the seed to the ground before speaking. Well, you see, there are kitsunes. And there are kitsune. And there is kitsune. I never said I was kitsune. Merely, I am kitsune. You can surely see I am no common fox. Now show yourself. Surely one with such a beautiful voice must be equally pleasing to the eye. Sit with me and eat some delicious plums from my friend the Tiger King's tree. Out of the shadows stepped a resplendent lady tigress. She wore her stripes with humble confidence and looked Kitsune in the eye as she circled him beneath the broad plum tree. Perhaps... I will have a small snack, she sang with a sideways smile. My goodness, Kitsune said, dropping the plums he was holding. He bowed deeply. Princess. I have heard tales of your beauty, but never in my many lives have I ever been in the presence of one such as you. He glanced up with a deep smile in his eyes. The tiger princess continued to circle the kitsune, humming in a purr-like growl. Surely you would never eat one such as me. I am but a young kitsune, returning home from a long journey. I can offer you a wish. That is, if you wish. Surely you have heard tales of kitsune magic, kitsune said, igniting a small blue ball of fire over his shoulder as he stood to face the tigress. The princess stopped, enthralled by the foxfire. The guileless smile that played on kitsune's lips was almost convincing. She narrowed her golden brown eyes. Trickster, little dog, what makes you think you have anything I want? You can keep your blue ball. and all that goes with it. I have great power, as you know. All kitsunes share in the power of kitsune magic. I can grant you wealth, strength, anything, anything at all. That is, except beauty. For I cannot improve on that which is already flawless. Pfft! Please! Such flattery is unbecoming and insincere. even from a fool such as you. But what the tigress did not know, perhaps for the first time ever, he was sincere. Then, if there is nothing you want, I will give you what you first desired, Kitsune said, extinguishing his blue ball of fire. I can think of nothing that would satisfy me more than to be eaten by you. I ask only that you do it slowly, so I can savor every moment of my time with you, that I may stop time and remain in the embrace of your teeth and claws for eternity. My heart is already yours. All there is left to do is take my body, for it is but a husk without my heart. The tigress laid down, tilting her head ever so slightly. You are a funny one, she said. Princess, I assure you there was no humor in anything I have said. My heart, my hands, my fire are yours to consume. Maybe tomorrow I will eat you, the tigress said. Now, fatten yourself on sweet plums so you will not be so scrawny. And with that she was gone beyond sight, the way only tigers can do. The following morning, Kitsune woke beneath the plum tree, just as the sun was peeking over the hills across the wide valley. He looked towards home and longed for the rich scent of the soil from which he came, for the sounds of laughter from his brothers and sisters."'Oh, did I wake you?' the tigress said."'Surely your love for me is as strong as mine is for you, or you would not be here so early in the morning,' Kitsune said.""'I merely had a small breakfast,' said the tigress."'I have come to see if you are fat enough to eat yet.'"'Not yet,' said Kitsune."'Maybe if you cooked me some dumplings to go with these plums.' The tigress went away and returned with dumplings."'I made some tea from the mountain plants,' Kitsune said, pouring the tigress a cup of tea. They sat and ate quietly, sipping tea in the morning sun." As the sun rose above the trees and the light turned to dappled shade, Kitsune patted his full belly. Okay. My heart is full. My belly is full. Now it is time for you to eat me. Maybe tomorrow, the tigress said, disappearing into the shadows of the mountain wood. When Kitsune awoke the next sunrise, tigress was there with rice and salted fish. They ate and drank tea until the sun was high in the sky and the shade was heavy in the forest. Kitsune laid on his back at the tigress's feet. Alas, surely it is time. Maybe tomorrow, the tigress said. This went on for weeks, the tigress bringing food to Kitsune, and each day Kitsune offering his life to the tigress. On the 28th day, when the traveler's moon was in the sky with the sun, Kitsune said to the tigress, Be my bride. and promised me to watch the sunrise every day together for the rest of time. I cannot marry without my father's permission. Come to the mountaintop and ask my father's blessing. So, Kitsune and the tigress walked up the mountain to meet the tiger king. Upon reaching the highest ridge, Kitsune saw two tigers of great size and beauty. What is this you have brought before me, daughter? The tiger king roared. Have you brought home a pet? The tiger queen inquired. This is Kitsune, came a tiny squeak from the tigress. The tiger king's eyes narrowed and he sniffed in Kitsune's direction. I smell fish and dumplings and plums from my tree. He is a thief and you have caught him and brought him here for punishment. Excellent daughter. You know you can never trust this sort. They are deceitful little beasts. The tigress lowered her eyes and Kitsune stepped forward, igniting his foxfire to illuminate his face. I am Kitsune. I am descended from the great Kitsune, the nine-tailed guardian of Inari and keeper of the gateway between life and death. I am here to humbly request your daughter's hand in marriage. What?!
UNKNOWN:!
SPEAKER_00:roared the Tiger King. Never, roared the Tiger Queen, cutting off the protests of her husband. She is our only child. She is far too important to marry one such as you. You Kitsunes are lower than beggars. You are scoundrels, tricksters, gamblers, drunks, womanizers. You are the lowest form of beast on this earth. Our daughter is a princess. She is heir to the mountain and never... Would we allow her to marry one such as you? Never, the Tiger King growled. Sir, said Kitsune, bringing his foxfire to dance in his right hand. Sir, my hands and my heart and my magic would be yours to command. I will be loyal to none other than your daughter and her family. My clan would support you in all of your endeavors. I don't need... nor would I ever accept anything from the likes of you. Now leave my presence before I kill you and feed you to the rats. Kitsune bowed deeply and backed from the presence of the tiger queen and king. The next morning, when he awoke beneath the plum tree, the tigress was picking plums. What are you doing? Kitsune asked. I will miss these plums when we go to live with your family. I want some for the journey, and I want the seeds so our children can play in the shade of many new plum trees. Kitsune packed up his kit, and they departed the Tiger Mountain, never to return. Some would think this is where the story ends, and I'm sure there is a story about their journey across a valley to the low mountains where the Kitsune clan makes their home, but this story is also about the Tiger Queen. You see, after some days, the tiger queen asked her husband if he had seen their daughter. The husband says, no, he has not. So they begin looking. That night, when they return to their mountaintop, he says, that damn fox stole my plums. We will not have any to salt and pickle for the winter. The queen says, I'm afraid he has stolen more than your plums. She calls out and roars for her daughter. She calls out and roars all night long for her daughter to come home. She calls out and roars so loudly, she awakens the dragon. The dragon, rising into the sky next to the highest ridge of the mountain, asks, What is all this noise for? Why the racket? The tiger queen tells the story of how Kitsune stole her daughter to be his bride, and how she just wanted her daughter to come home, that she was afraid she would never see her daughter again, that she would never know her grandchildren. The dragon assured her that there would be no marriage, for Kitsune is only merry in the spring and fall, when there are sun showers, when the sun is out and it is raining at the same time. The dragon reminded the tiger queen that it was midsummer, And there was no chance of a sun shower for months to come. The dragon said, Granddaughter, climb onto my back so we can fly up high and see across the great valley. We will find your daughter and bring her home. But hour after hour and day after day, the Tigress and Kitsune hid from the eyes of the dragon and the eyes of the Tiger Queen. One morning, while flying high in the sky, the Tiger Queen started crying. Her howls were so mournful that all of the birds in the sky, every living thing, also cried. The Tiger Queen cried so hard it left permanent lines at the corners of her eyes. This is why it always looks like the tiger is crying. The Tiger Queen cried so much that her tears fell like rain in the sunlit sky. The Tiger Queen cried so much on that sunny morning The kitsune was able to marry his beloved tiger bride. So, what do you think of the story? So, how is that like you and your wife? Was she trying to consume you at first? No, I kept saying to her, eat me. No, she's the only child. And her parents really like me. Yeah. They weren't like the Tiger King and Tiger Queen. But when I was telling my mom that I asked Denise to marry me, my mom said, oh, you're stealing the only child, just like the Tiger Bride. And I said, what? Tell me about the Tiger Bride. My mom is a piece of work. I could tell you story after story about my mom. Your mother is lovely. Oh, yeah. My God. Everybody says that. But I truly know my mom. And her name, when I was reading kitsune lore, she is named after one of the witches that was practicing that kitsune magic that befriended the kitsunes, yeah. And my uncle is named after one of the... samurai that used kitsune magic and i think that there was more to it than i actually first thought do you think that maybe there's something there that's helping you survive through your lifetime as part of that magic perhaps yeah i i do find the parallels between uh the japanese culture and and uh native culture to be uh striking you know because coyote who's our trickster here is a wild dog similar to tanuki and there's many stories about coyote and and the fox yeah going on adventures together or interacting and whenever coyote dies his brother fox comes and jumps over him four times and brings him back to life so coyote never dies a story about um coyote tricking the fox. The fox's duty is to guard the gateway between life and death. And this is a native story. And I find that parallel to be very interesting that Fox guards the gateway between life and death. Yeah. And Coyote talks the Fox into taking a vacation so Coyote can guard that gateway. So why is it that it's the same characters, right? I have the same question with Sasquatch, right? It's repeating in multiple cultures all over the world. Is it like a mass, you know? It's an archetypal hero, archetypal figure. I don't understand. I don't know. But even when cultures don't meet, like before we had like, you know, sea travel and whatever, like these things were still coming up. the same in completely different places on the earth? So, I don't know. When I was a religious studies major, I was told to go to this library and look up a non-Christian text that talked about creation. So I looked up this Mongolian text. It was about the Ayhu people. And there was a hero... Deathworms? Are they deathworms? No, it was a hero that cut off the... You remember Tiamat from your days of playing Dungeons and Dragons? No. Tiamat. It's like, I don't remember if it was seven heads or nine headed dragon. Oh, okay. And it was the evil dragon. Well, this hero cuts off the heads of this dragon and spreads the teeth and the teeth become the mountains. The heart becomes where the people lived. And then I, much later, I was reading a Nez Perce story about about Coyote, how he killed this monster and he spread the teeth out and they became the mountains. He cut off the head and the heart became the place where the people lived. And I thought, you know, that's exactly like the story that I read in the library. And so, you know, those similarities across cultures have always fascinated me. But The Tiger Bride specifically is about Fox stealing the only child of the The Tiger King and Queen. My mom felt like that's what I was doing. I was stealing an only child out of her clan to marry into our clan. Can you make fire? That's what I want to know. Do I have blue balls of fire that I can produce? Yes. Tell you what. I'll try. I'm good with it. I mean, I think we've got to have other stories. You trying to kill me? Coffee will kill me, man. Okay, there's tea in it for you. Okay, I'll drink tea. Maybe a little Jameson's now and then, too. All right. Oh, yeah, that would be good. Okay, so one last question for you. Yeah. If you were a yokai... What kind of yokai would you be? I tell you what, Bob. If I were a yokai, that's another story for another time. Thank you for listening to us. You can find us on our website at www.uncannycoffeepodcast.com Our blue sky by looking for Uncanny Coffee. And we'll see you next time. And remember, never whistle at night. Actively disobey oppressive regimes. And above all else, remember, we are not all monsters. Wanted to do that again. I thought it was great.
UNKNOWN:All right. All right.
SPEAKER_00:Dr. Kitsune and Odd Bob's Uncanny Coffee Hour is produced by Mitch Kiyotakitsune and Bob Mason. And copyright protected under all laws, foreign, domestic, and supernatural by the Unseelie Court.